The perils of (unem)’ployment

I must have angered the gods of unemployment somehow.  Not content with shattering my idyllic life by sending Millie out on her school summer holidays they’ve today sent Amber home from nursery with a temperature, so I could have two children at home with me tomorrow.

This is a situation I can handle but it’s not a desirable situation, by any means.  Even more so if Amber remains ill and Millie is bursting with irrepressible energy.  Millie was promised today that we’d have “an adventure” tomorrow, so if she’s thwarted in that things could take a turn for the desperate.

Poor Amber, she was laid on the sofa tonight looking hot, pink and cute, sadly repeating “Amby poorly” to anyone who’d listen.  So not only have my hopes of playing Demigod and doing some reading gone out of the window, but even the lesser hope of “an adventure” tomorrow – which would at least get us out of the house – looks to be fading rapidly. 😦

This unemployment is not working out the way I’d envisioned it.

I’d imagined dropping the girls at their various childcare establishments, tidying up, putting some washing on and then catching up on series 2 of True Blood.  Then I might surf the web to catch up on my news fix, have some nice lunch, read a bit, possibly do some exercise or maybe watch a recorded film.  I’d check the job sites, send out a few CVs and covering letters and arrange an interview or two so that I could start back at work just as my books-to-read and DVDs-to-watch piles reached rock-bottom.

In reality I seem to have alternated between panicking that I’ll never get a job ever again and having chronic diarrhoea, and that’s no way for anyone to live. 😦

Most of the time thus far I’ve been relatively confident that I’ll find another job fairly soon, that we won’t starve or be forced to borrow money; sometimes, however – usually following a few terse rejections in a row – I have panicked worried a little  – what if my job at Yahoo! was a once-in-a-lifetime fluke?  What if I really do know nothing and have no explicable skills worth hiring?  What then??

At the moment I’m on an upswing following a nice weekend away, being paid my redundancy money and having two hopeful employment leads to follow up this week, but the ugly thought that I might still be unemployed in six months is never more than a rejection email away…

So the enjoyable parts of being unemployed seem to be slipping through my fingers at the moment.  I was hoping to stanch that flow with “an adventure” with Millie tomorrow, but Amber may have put a stop even to that.  Sigh.

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