I feel a bit guilty for going on about my grief and sadness here. It’s four weeks to the day since Trev’s death and I’m aware that the casual reader may feel it’s time I climbed back up on my horse and started get on with my life.
And I wish I could. See, the thing is, following Amber’s third birthday party yesterday – which was fun and an occasion for celebration – I’m feeling sad again. But the thing is, I’m not consciously thinking about Trev and how awful his death is and how defeated we all feel…I just feel sad anyway.
Even without thinking about Trev and how much I miss him, even without dwelling upon my memories, even without looking at photos of Amber’s party and mentally inserting Trev into them…
Even without doing any of that I just feel sad anyway.