If you only knew…

Looking back at some photographs with Amber briefly this morning I was struck that there’s an aura of something like innocence veiling the ones taken around Christmas last year.  Seeing Trev in them makes it seem like a lost world, a world where everything was rosy and warm and we were blissfully unaware how fleeting such times really are.

It felt like nostalgia, but I think loss of innocence describes it better.

I kept thinking of the laughing happy people in those pictures, “If you only knew…



  1. last night I wrote myself a letter to be opened in ten years time, It’s part of my Day Zero project I have going on at the moment (http://sillywrongbutvividright.wordpress.com/day-zero/ if you’re interested.) All i could hear, as i wrote the letter, was the Melanie of 2021 saying ‘If only you knew’ while reading it in some far off, distant time, as hover cars fly past the wondow… Of course, i don’t know what the future me would like me to know, because life doesn’t work that way. What would this photo have looked like, if they did know?

  2. I often think of this blog as a letter to my future self, Mel. And I’ve used it to say “Hello from the year 2010!” to my two girls when they’re all grown up.
    It is quite a strange thing to imagine – those two little people asleep next to you all grown up and reading something you’re writing *now*, and it was quite emotional, too – wanting them to understand how much you love them right at that particular moment so very long ago…

    It’s slightly different from writing a letter to yourself because a letter (I assume) is put away and stays hidden, whereas the blog is permanently on display. That said, I occasionally go back and read what I wrote a few years ago and it’s frightening how much we forget without even realising.
    I am *so* glad I’ve kept this blog/diary now. 🙂

    And thanks for your continued and interesting comments, by the way – it’s both flattering and heartening to know that someone you’ve never met finds your life interesting!

  3. That’s nice. I often read your blogs and think to myself ‘aw I hope the girls get to read this one day!’ I think the reason I love reading about your stories of the girls so much is that I’m a real daddies girl; dad brought me up on his own, so I get all soppy for good father daughter relationships!

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