You may recall I had a job interview and copywriting test with a charity last week. The interview went only “averagely” well, I thought, but the copywriting test was a different story.
Turns out I was right. They’ve been in touch to say I wasn’t quite right for the job I interviewed for, but my test was quote – amazing – unquote, and would I be interested in doing some freelance work for them? 🙂
So, a real case of swings and roundabouts there, and one that is making me think seriously about trying for some freelance work to supplement whatever “proper” job I do manage to get.
The problem with trying this avenue is largely one of self confidence: my faith in my own ability to write ebbs and flows. Sometimes I’m convinced I’m a copywriting rockstar; at others I wonder if I’m not just an out-of-my-depth amateur.
Going freelance would be a challenge because I’d have to prove once and for all that I can write well.
Sure, I’ve been blogging for years, and I work (albeit, not for much longer) as a copywriter, but there’s often a little nervous voice in my head worrying that people are simply saying nice things about what I write because they don’t want to hurt my feelings (and being made redundant from my job after just a few months doesn’t help with that – even if I’ve been told it’s absolutely not a reflection on my copywriting skills).
But at the core of this fear is the fact that I’m not terribly good at many other things; so, if I’m not even good at writing (says the little nervous voice) then I must be completely useless.
Yeah, it’s stupid, I know, but that’s why being told my work is quote amazing unquote by someone who has no investment in my feelings feels like a big deal.
Maybe I’ll look back on this blog entry in a year’s time, when I’m the world’s highest paid copywriter, and laugh.
By the way, I also have a second interview tomorrow for a different writing job, so I must be doing something right.