Following last month’s Oh, Amber… post, I’m sad to have to report the Lovely Melanie has been called to the school to discuss another such incident.
Amber made one of her friends cry yesterday, calling her a “stinky baby” (no laughing at the back, please!) and trying to stop her playing with another friend.
Yeah, maybe it doesn’t sound like a big deal, but it’s not very nice. The letter also mentions a certain unruly streak that we already know Amber has, and if the teacher thinks it’s enough of a problem to call us in for a chat then as far as we’re concerned it’s serious.
Amber had Dolly taken away, was given a talking to by the Lovely Melanie and warned that I would also want to speak to her (“Really?” I asked. “Yes,” replied the Lovely Melanie).
So I sat down with her this morning. We had a chat about how being nasty would cost her friends and see her excluded from games. Is that what she wanted? I asked.
As usual, she didn’t want to reply because she knows the answer, but I pushed a bit and made her say it.
Basically, that’s the strategy here: keep mentioning the incident, emphasising our disapproval and reminding her of the consequences again and again and again.
I also opted for a bit of good parent-bad parent: sitting down, explaining that we love her and are only treating this so seriously because we don’t want her to lose all her friends and be sad.
She’s been sent in to school today with a letter for her teacher which says we’re worried about this behaviour too and won’t tolerate it. Amber’s also been made to write a letter apologising to her friend.
Does this seem a bit over the top? Well, perhaps.
All I can tell you is the Lovely Melanie and I would both be horrified to think that our daughter was the class bully. We’ve had a small bullying problem with Millie (from the other perspective) and it would seem oddly perverse if one daughter was bullied and the other a bullier!