“I want a ‘phone for Christmas. Please.”


This morning, shouted from the top of the stairs…

MILLIE: Do you know what I want for Christmas?

ME: Millie, it’s September; I haven’t thought about Halloween yet, let alone Christmas.

MILLIE: But have a guess.

ME: A pony.

MILLIE: No.

ME: A giraffe.

MILLIE: No.

ME: World peace.

MILLIE: No.

ME: Socks.

MILLIE: No.

ME: After-shave.

MILLIE: No.

ME: A boob job.

MILLIE: No.

ME: A new graphics card.  [This is a standing joke in our house]

MILLIE: No.

ME: A full set of Encyclopedia Britannica.

MILLIE: No.

ME: Control of the sea.

MILLIE: No.

ME: The Breaking Bad box-set.

MILLIE: No.

ME: I give up, what do you want for Christmas?

smartphones

MILLIE: A ‘phone so I can play games on it.

ME: We have the tablet, you can play games on that.  And the two smartphones.  And the computer.

MILLIE: But I want my own ‘phone to play on.

ME: But not to ‘phone people on?

MILLIE: No, just to play on.

ME: You’ll be better off with a tablet, then.

MILLIE: But I just want a little ‘phone to play on – not a posh one like yours, just a little one.

ME: A tablet would be better for games and watching YouTube. (And probably cheaper, too).

MILLIE: A white one?

ME: What?

MILLIE: Like Izzy’s.  A white one.

ME: I’ll have to talk to your mother about it.

MILLIE: Yay!!

ME: That’s not a yes, that’s a I’ll talk to Mummy about the possibility of maybe considering the chances of one day getting you a tablet.

MILLIE: Yay!  I’m getting a tablet!

ME: No no no no no!  I’ll have a talk with Mummy and…

MILLIE: Tablet!  Tablet!  Tablet!

Later…

THE LOVELY MELANIE: No.

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